This is a sobering report on the effects of PTS among service members, and is why we at The FEW remain committed to doing our part to save lives.
WNCN: News, Weather, and Sports for Raleigh Durham, NC
FAYETTEVILLE, N.C. –
For some veterans, the war doesn’t end when they arrive back in the United States. Shaken by their experiences, they can suffer from post-traumatic stress disorder, living with a severe anxiety that can devastate lives and families.
Two veterans who have struggled with PTSD are Matthew Brown and Bobby Price, who explained their symptoms and their paths to recovery.
“I was prepared to die for my brothers around me,” said Brown. “I was prepared to die to keep people at home safe.”
“I signed up to serve my country,” said Price, a retired member of the Military Police.
Brown said he never touched a single drink before joining the military.
“It didn’t hit me in the beginning,” said Price. “It started wearing on me little by little.”
Brown and Price had two very different experiences in the military, but have at least two things in common – their love for their families – and post-traumatic stress disorder.
“I was wounded,” Brown said. “I was not even 21 yet and had no drive, ambition, nothing. My girlfriend had just left me. I was totally lost.”
Brown is 28 now and says he has the appearance of a normal life, with a wife and two children. But the memories of his time in Fallujah with the Marines continue to haunt him.
“We were surrounded, basically, and we were shooting everywhere,” Brown said. “The guy that was shooting found me first.”
His scars are permanent reminders of that shooting. But that is just the beginning of a long road to recovery.
Brown even admitted he had thoughts of criminal behavior after leaving the military.
“The homicidal feelings, they were there,” he said.
He said, “Someone would do something wrong, and I would reach for my gun that didn’t exist. But then I started carrying a gun and I pulled it on someone, basically in their face, and I thought, ‘Uh, maybe it’s time to stop carrying this’ because I will go to jail for the rest of my life.
After coming back from war, Brown also started abusing drugs and alcohol. He became addicted to Percocet, vicodin, oxycontin and methadone.
“To shut my head up for five minutes and 10 minutes to sleep,” he said.
Sgt. Steven Bates of the Fayetteville Police Department says he sees this type of problem all the time.
“Usually it’s drunk and disorderly, that kind of stuff – DWIs, spousal abuse, because their coping mechanisms are degraded and they’re more sensitive to external stimulus than they would be normally able to cope with.”
That sensitivity is what prevents veteran Bobby Price from having a normal life.
“I’ve had my dark time,” he said.
“I’ve become reclusive.”
He said he doesn’t like going out to see people.
“I stay home,” he said.
Price said he was once “an easy-going person.”
He had dedicated his life to the Military Police, serving in Iraq and Kosovo, and vividly remembers the moment that triggered his PTSD.
“I was in Taji with my platoon,” he said. “One of my best friends, a guy I was mentoring, got blown out. My platoon sergeant, because of my experience, had me sanitize his equipment, just wash it down, get all the blood off of it.”
For four years, Price hid his disorder and his murderous thoughts. He said he wanted to kill the commander of another unit that worked closely with his, a commander who “had given us orders to go out, go down routes that weren’t approved, that we didn’t have the authorization to go down.”
He said he hid his problems because he didn’t want to lose his security clearance and lose the confidence of his superiors.
“So I drank,” he said.
Price said he’s not drinking anymore but currently takes all these prescription drugs, on a daily basis, given by the Durham VA Medical Center.
As for Brown, he said he had been taking “too many” prescription pain killers.
“I was snorting them, chewing them, swallowing them, and then drank way too much on top of it, because in the back of my mind I wanted to die,” he said.
Now Brown writes poems and helps other veterans with his non-profit, “Love Your Veterans.”
His solution to PTSD?
“Get out of the house. Don’t sit and wallow in your self-pity,” he said.
“If you just sit there and think about it, and dwell on it, you’re slowly killing yourself.
Price, the retired Military Policeman, said he has a life that has “the appearance of normal.” But he said he can’t ignore it. “Because ignoring it is going to cost you so much more,” he said.
